I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
