Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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