I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize