If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
