I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize