You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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