I wish my penis had an off switch
You work out of a Hotel?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
