You work out of a Hotel?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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