what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I pour the whiskey from now on
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
