i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
