I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
