After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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