did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
