whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
