Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I just forgot I was standing up.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
