i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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