As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
