sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
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