fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
