idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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