all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize