so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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