Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
