omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
