great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
