oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Let's paint friendship bongs
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize