oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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