I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
