Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Pants 0. Shit 1.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
