She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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