Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize