is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
you inspire me to be a worse person
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
