Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
