Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
