i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize