Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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