Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize