i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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