My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
