dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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