trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies