found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We talked him into tasing himself.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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