I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
