yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
