Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
The beer is more important than you right now.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
