check it out our google latitudes are spooning
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
you inspire me to be a worse person
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
