I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize