Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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