How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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