where does the pee come out of this thing
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
