That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I've blown a few things in my day
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
